Wizards? The Plot Against Civilization pp. 41-43

 We start weird today, “Two years before the suppression of Illuminism in Bavaria its adepts had begun their work in France. The “magician” Cagliostro, generally reputed to be a Jew from Sicily, had been enrolled as an Illuminatus in Germany.”

Even if you’re not steeped in the history of occultism, mysticism, and conspiracy theories; the name Cagliostro rings a faint bell. He’s one of those names that makes you think, “why do I know that…?” The name has appeared throughout the history of film, television, and culture. In fiction he’s a wizard or a wiseman. In reality he’s a lot closer to someone like Elon Musk—basically a shitposter conman who earned a reputation doing things like alchemy and scrying. In the 18th century it was lot harder to double check claims about psychic healing. Cagliostro traveled around Europe making claims, putting on a show, and then leaving town. Toward the end of his life, his reputation was severely diminished and was regarded as nothing more than a charlatan.

In the conspiracy world, when you get to the weirder parts—he’s an occult wizard more like Dr. Strange (and even appears in the Dr. Strange comics) though it’s not consistent whether he is villain or hero. Does Webster believe in magic? I don’t know, but I’m leaning toward “yes” simply because she thinks its important that Weishaupt was steeped in occultism (though, to repeat from last week, there’s no good evidence that this was the case) and that she mention Cagliostro.

Yet, that’s the minor part of the quoted sentence. She mentions that people think he was a Jew from Sicily. I wrote last week that the Webster is a fascist but her racism toward the German people was one of the things that prevented her from becoming a Nazi. Well, here’s another thing parallel, she hates Jews. This should be apparent, but it will become more obvious later. There is no reason to mention that he’s alleged to be Jewish otherwise, there’s less reason to take up half of the page (41) with an excessive footnote attempting to justify why she claimed he was Jewish.

Her evidence is that “no definite proof to the contrary has been produced.” So her accusation is valid because no one has ever said otherwise to her satisfaction. Cagliostro himself was raised Christian by Christian parents so that should settle the issue.

The claim here is that Cagliostro was initiated into the Illuminati and then was sent as their emissary across Europe. Cagliostro is very wealthy, but he’s also being funded by the Illuminati to spread their message across Europe. According to Webster, all of this is a confession procured from papers inside an iron box that the Inquisition opened. Which is not a confession, but that’s being a little pedantic when there are larger issues in the story.

It seems that Cagliostro met a certain Cardinal de Rohan and quickly trapped his mind with his hypnotic powers. A power that is still “practised by propagandists of Illuminism.”

So, yes, she believes in magic. This raises the question: how did the Illuminati get suppressed if they can capture minds with their hypnotic powers? The question is very important because grand super conspiracy theorists make this mistake all of the time. If “they” are fixing elections then why should we vote? The omni-conspiracy theorists like Webster who invoke the powers of hypnotic magic to enslave minds live in a world where the very people who possess these powers are unable to use them to save themselves.

Cagliostro is going to be betrayed by two friends (and possibly his wife) to the Inquisition. This isn’t like the Jedi being betrayed by the Clones in the middle of a battle, he’s in Rome just hanging out. Let’s say that they surprised him, fine, how is he interrogated any longer than “you must release me” and a wave of his hand? How is the Illuminati order suppressed if they possess these powers?

It’s the inconsistency that drives me nuts. This isn’t like a plot hole in a movie, those bother me as well; but here this is supposed to be history. This is being portrayed as how things happened and are continuing to happen. We live in a world, according to Nesta Webster, where a group of people can hypnotize others into doing their bidding but are unable to use that power to save themselves.

The result of these powers was in seizing control of 266 of the Masonic lodges in Europe without the lodges or their members, save a very small group, ever becoming aware of it. If this is the case, then how did they accomplish anything? The members are supposed to be doing things in furtherance of the goal. It never seemed odd to them that their meetings changed from Rib and beer night to infiltrating the monarchy.

Let’s also remember what the stated goal of the Illuminati was in both reality and in Webster’s telling: the toppling of a world run by kings and priests. Not world domination, but just the ending of rigid authoritarian systems. When looking at conspiracy theorists it’s helpful to understand what they are actually against, and what Webster is against is a world run by people who don’t wear crowns.