The Plot: Proofs of a Conspiracy...pp. 133-137

 I've often wondered in my many readings of these types of conspiracy theories how the conspirators recruit their employees. If, as the Flat Earthers claim, there is an ice wall and that wall is guarded; then who is guarding it? Where is that recruitment drive? Does it pay well? As an academic I get lumped in as one of those leftist-socialists-gay indoctrinators that are paid to promote climate change, the homosexual agenda, and the idea that Christianity is stupid--but I assure the reader, the meager wage that I am paid is not reflective of my place as a cog in the wheel that grinds white Christian America into dust. As a person who could use the cash and actually does teach that the science for climate change is legitimate, that gay people are people, and that Christianity has some evidence problems I could use the cash. I protested Trump at the March for Science and according to Alex Jones that was a George Soros-led initiative but I never got my check. Is there a form to fill out? What is happening with that? 

Kidding aside, how does the Illuminati recruit members? Well, Robison, has the answer through this German Union. Apparently, you just send them some money and they send you a recruitment pamphlet. That's it. I don't know what I was expecting in the 18th century but that kind of recruitment seems awfully anti-climactic. Robison gives us the rundown but first, we need a little background. It would seem that a couple of books appeared for sale; one called "Archives of Fanaticism and Illuminatism." This book, Robison claims was "slight and unsatisfactory." I can guess why, one of the great humor of studying this subject is that the word "Illuminism" and "Illuminati" are so close in spelling but so far in meaning. The latter is our esteemed superconspirators the former means "occult." Robison I'm sure grabbed this book thinking that it was going to be about the zealous and unscrupulous nature of the Illuminati only to read a book about the 18th-century mystics who still preferred alchemy, Kabbalah, and hermeneutics. He tossed that aside in favor of a book titled "More Notes than Text, or The German Union of XXII, a new Secret Society for the Good of Mankind."

This book, Robison admits is wanting in a few respects but is the more thorough of the competing works so he's going to base his conspiracy on this one. One quick question is how he knows that one book is lacking information. I know when a copy of the Republic is lacking because I can compare it to another version of the Republic. Robison doesn't have this ability. He can only compare the conspiracy work to other conspiracy works but, and this is really important, these books are appearing anonymously. No one knows if a crank is writing them, or just a bored guy having a bit of sport with the gullible. 

The book begins by explaining that a vast undertaking exists against the tide of Reason and the suppression of education. We know this part exists because Robison has been railing again teaching reason, and he's even lauded the ability of local regents in enforcing only one kind of education. Whether this is a coordinated affair across Europe is a different story though. The way I understand it to be working is that each local principality is going to do the exact same thing for their own self-interest, but would not need to coordinate with each other on how to do it. If the Bavarian King and the Bohemian King are both suppressing education, they might pass notes to each other; but then again, if one is Lutheran and the other Catholic they would not. The Catholic king would look at both of them as heretics likewise the Lutheran King. 

The recruitment advertisement then claims that they represent a council that would seek to become a bulwark against this plot (a plot that, mind you, only the document claims exists), and for the price of a rix-Dahler; one can join the association and oppose the suppression of reason. A rix-Dahler is a Swedish coin, which amounts to about 1/6 of a Kroner; which has no equivalent today because of the EU. It's a small amount but not so small as to be inconsequential. Today, and I'm guessing here, it's probably about 9.99. Just enough to make it worth it for both sides.

Upon payment, one receives the oath of the association and a membership form to fill out and send back. Upon receiving this, the German Union then sends the applicant "the Plan." All of these are printed on a 4to sheet (this is a 19 x 24-inch sheet folded four times to produce an eight-page book), "For the price of a couple cups of coffee, you too, can join the worldwide struggle..."

I don't want to call this a scam because you are getting a few little booklets out of it, but there's very little here which makes my skeptical brain think this is evidence of the Illuminati in Germany. Now, I don't think that there is anything here. There is perhaps a group that is opposed to the theocratic monarchy in the German-speaking states which realizes that the suppression of education is a bad thing. The entire oath, and what Robison has reported from these 4to sheets is too long to quote, but it reads like someone trying to start a new political party: once they get enough members they will reveal themselves and begin setting up a formal system. 

Robison's at-length quote also details the secrecy of this order. They are going to claim that they are merely a reading society in order to hide from the public. While I'm sure that this is going to be taken as nefarious by the average reader; we must also consider that organizations that sought to instruct the population on the principles of the Enlightenment would run counter to the wishes of the local aristocracy and would thereby be banned and the members possibly imprisoned. There would be a need to hide as something which would look as harmless as a reading society. 

The reading society angle is the lynchpin in the entire organization. They would create magazines and gazettes; recruit booksellers and publishers in order to disseminate their works. I see this as a good use of the media of the day. Today, the German Union would probably recruit bloggers and web designers; create podcast networks, and some tik-tokkers in order to spread their message. 

This is stage one of the plan. It's a good plan too, but importantly for our reading of this book, it is a plan. It's only taken about 137 pages until we got one, but here we are. The plan is to create an organization that will recruit people in order to teach them the principles of the 18th-century Enlightenment movement. We must also consider a comment I made earlier, this could be a scam. This entire thing could be the work of an individual trying to profit off people wanting to join the academic fad that was sweeping through Europe. Ben Franklin was, in every conceivable way, a celebrity of rock star proportions at this time; and this recruitment pamphlet could be seeking to profit off of this in much the same way that numerous products with the "i-" prefix appeared when the iPod hit the peak of its popularity. 

To repeat though, at least we are getting a plan.